What am I supposed to do?
Ok, I admit, I'm very confused with myself right now.
I'm a childish person and nobody likes that (or so some say). I have very odd habits,
lazy to do work (especially since last sem) and too afraid to show my true potential in everything.
Is there really something wrong with me? What happened to me that I molded this insecure personality? Is it stress, paranoia or just plain me?
What do I lack , hmm.. that's simple, I lack confidence, belief in myself and doubt that I can do things as well as others but in my own way. This feeling is so familiar as it's the same feel I had when I frist joined, Kolej Tuanku Ja'afar, when I was form3.
According to my current group of friends, they said it's because of my style and probably because I crave attention. Maybe I do, but why? what did i do to become this way? Why did I bring back the 'me' that I closed up years before?
When I first started Multimedia University, Cyber, I admit I was nervous, but after a few months, I enjoyed myself and eventhough I'm weak in assignments, I hardly skipped class. Besides that, I always had a smile on my face no matter the consequences.
But look at me now, I'm become quiet, I mope and don't concentrate in my work till my group members don't wanna talk to me. I've become useless and can't think for myself, or atleast that's what happens nowadays.
I guess they were right, sooner or later I'll be drawn away from them, but i didn't realise it was for real, till i can't even share a joke with them T_T. They're a good
bunch of people and know what's best for me, but why am I finding it hard to believe them?
Do I or do I not have to change? I was happy-go-lucky and would always find a way to brighten someones day which would in the end brighten mine. But why am I so lost now?
what am I supposed to do?
I know what I must do, but the big step is just so hard to take and I fear of getting misjudged (as I always do). Eventhough I'm always confronting people, in truth,I'm afraid of them. I trust too easily and sometimes give false hope.
Lately I've been anything but happy-go-lucky, I've become my the opposite side that I never wanted to venture to.
There has got to be a way to get back my good side, but if i have to do it, I need to get it fast. Despite the fact i have lots of assignments, (which I have to get done anyway) I need extra curricular activities. I remember being the one whom does everything and always manages to keep her studies on a moderate level.
I have to somehow get that girl back and for now, that would be my goal.
I know, I know, assignments are important, too. But... without that vibe, I'll never be able to do my assignments at the level it was before.
I guess that's all I have to say this time and I hope I'll achieve my goal.
As a message to all that may come across this blog,
Please stay on the right track or you'll suffer. Keep smiling and the best way to brighten your day (though you may not believe it) is to brighten other's day.
You are what you are and if you were to change, make sure you don't stray too far from who you are.
(Hahaha... there I go again, forgive me if I'm talking nonsense ^^;;; :D :S)
I'm a childish person and nobody likes that (or so some say). I have very odd habits,
lazy to do work (especially since last sem) and too afraid to show my true potential in everything.
Is there really something wrong with me? What happened to me that I molded this insecure personality? Is it stress, paranoia or just plain me?
What do I lack , hmm.. that's simple, I lack confidence, belief in myself and doubt that I can do things as well as others but in my own way. This feeling is so familiar as it's the same feel I had when I frist joined, Kolej Tuanku Ja'afar, when I was form3.
According to my current group of friends, they said it's because of my style and probably because I crave attention. Maybe I do, but why? what did i do to become this way? Why did I bring back the 'me' that I closed up years before?
When I first started Multimedia University, Cyber, I admit I was nervous, but after a few months, I enjoyed myself and eventhough I'm weak in assignments, I hardly skipped class. Besides that, I always had a smile on my face no matter the consequences.
But look at me now, I'm become quiet, I mope and don't concentrate in my work till my group members don't wanna talk to me. I've become useless and can't think for myself, or atleast that's what happens nowadays.
I guess they were right, sooner or later I'll be drawn away from them, but i didn't realise it was for real, till i can't even share a joke with them T_T. They're a good
bunch of people and know what's best for me, but why am I finding it hard to believe them?
Do I or do I not have to change? I was happy-go-lucky and would always find a way to brighten someones day which would in the end brighten mine. But why am I so lost now?
what am I supposed to do?
I know what I must do, but the big step is just so hard to take and I fear of getting misjudged (as I always do). Eventhough I'm always confronting people, in truth,I'm afraid of them. I trust too easily and sometimes give false hope.
Lately I've been anything but happy-go-lucky, I've become my the opposite side that I never wanted to venture to.
There has got to be a way to get back my good side, but if i have to do it, I need to get it fast. Despite the fact i have lots of assignments, (which I have to get done anyway) I need extra curricular activities. I remember being the one whom does everything and always manages to keep her studies on a moderate level.
I have to somehow get that girl back and for now, that would be my goal.
I know, I know, assignments are important, too. But... without that vibe, I'll never be able to do my assignments at the level it was before.
I guess that's all I have to say this time and I hope I'll achieve my goal.
As a message to all that may come across this blog,
Please stay on the right track or you'll suffer. Keep smiling and the best way to brighten your day (though you may not believe it) is to brighten other's day.
You are what you are and if you were to change, make sure you don't stray too far from who you are.
(Hahaha... there I go again, forgive me if I'm talking nonsense ^^;;; :D :S)
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