Obsession, Passion and Confusion
Like the title says,
I am having several mixed emotions on certain things.
What should or could I do after I've finished my studies or should I carry on studying before I decide to start working?
Do I pursue something which I have been wishing to do all my life or obey my parents and pursue the path they wish and hope I would do?
I admit, I have a slight obsession with performing, whether or not it is my best, as well as reading fantasy novels, graphic novels, comics, drawing/ painting as well as martial arts and swimming, despite being lower than average.
So many paths I could have taken and pursued, but always either pursuing half-way or letting the opportunity slide. Maybe not all, but alot.
Though I do also admit that I wouldn't be where I am, or meet the people I know now if I had not gone through this path. I wouldn't have even met my current boyfriend whom I have been dating for almost 9 months now.
For the things I like to do I've listed below:
- Singing
- Reading
- Writing
- Performing (wushu, dancing(though I'm not that good), acting(need practice)...etc..)
- Play video games (whether on portable consoles,PS2,Computer or online games etc...)
- Baking (cookies, brownies & cakes)
- Painting
- Playing sports (martial arts, swimming, scuba diving & badminton)
- Creating fanvideos or videos
There are many more, but these are the main ones.
Those could be either my interests or my passions or even both.
The confusion lies not only in what I should or could do for the rest of my life, but also with who I would spend my life with.
A little sappy, I know.
Well, I'm happy with my boyfriend though we've been seeing each other rarely since I started my internship and moved out of my apartment in Cyberjaya.But for some reason I'm a tad confused with how the relationship is going.
True he is my first BF and is at least 5 years my senior and my graduated senior in MMU, Cyber. But as much as I care for him, for some reason I feel a bit distant.
Unsure whether I don't spend enough time with him or it's because of my old habit of being very clingy to those familiar around me, or if my feelings towards him are true or not.
But, will wait another year and see where it takes us, despite our religious background differences between our families. He is a Buddhist and I am Muslim.
********** ************ ********
We first met during my foundation year at MMU in the Game Developers club (GDC) in 2004/2005. We weren't close at the time, just acquaintances and he had just graduated in August that year.
In my 2nd year, during the 1st Sem of the Trimester, I met him again after being introduced to the pen & paper RPG replica game of Dungeons and Dragons (D&D) by 2 of my friends whom were in the GDC club and Emina Japanese Animation club.
From there, the crush began as next to my other senior of same faculty, I was the only girl in the game and the group. It was there I started having crushes on my bf and 2 other guys, one within the D&D group (chinese) and the other a temporary wushu member studying at CUCMS in Street Mall, a malay boy.
Long story short, for the year I started playing with them, I somehow got attracted to them more and more. Though most of the time I was either too clingy or just plain blur.
Eventually, after my 21st Birthday party, I confessed my feelings. Shocked I was when he revealed that he was waiting for me to confess after the 2nd year playing D&D with the group.
It became official on the 1st of January after some 'discussion'.
The end. Really long winded and sappy or then again maybe not.
******** ******* ****** ******* ********* ********* **********
OKay alot has been revealed in this post.
Please forgive me if it is very long and alot of things being repeated.
Well,
I guess that's all I have to say for today.
Thank you for all those who have dropped by :) and willing to read my posts
Arigato Gozaimas, Terima Kasih,
Ja ne , See ya
I am having several mixed emotions on certain things.
What should or could I do after I've finished my studies or should I carry on studying before I decide to start working?
Do I pursue something which I have been wishing to do all my life or obey my parents and pursue the path they wish and hope I would do?
I admit, I have a slight obsession with performing, whether or not it is my best, as well as reading fantasy novels, graphic novels, comics, drawing/ painting as well as martial arts and swimming, despite being lower than average.
So many paths I could have taken and pursued, but always either pursuing half-way or letting the opportunity slide. Maybe not all, but alot.
Though I do also admit that I wouldn't be where I am, or meet the people I know now if I had not gone through this path. I wouldn't have even met my current boyfriend whom I have been dating for almost 9 months now.
For the things I like to do I've listed below:
- Singing
- Reading
- Writing
- Performing (wushu, dancing(though I'm not that good), acting(need practice)...etc..)
- Play video games (whether on portable consoles,PS2,Computer or online games etc...)
- Baking (cookies, brownies & cakes)
- Painting
- Playing sports (martial arts, swimming, scuba diving & badminton)
- Creating fanvideos or videos
There are many more, but these are the main ones.
Those could be either my interests or my passions or even both.
The confusion lies not only in what I should or could do for the rest of my life, but also with who I would spend my life with.
A little sappy, I know.
Well, I'm happy with my boyfriend though we've been seeing each other rarely since I started my internship and moved out of my apartment in Cyberjaya.But for some reason I'm a tad confused with how the relationship is going.
True he is my first BF and is at least 5 years my senior and my graduated senior in MMU, Cyber. But as much as I care for him, for some reason I feel a bit distant.
Unsure whether I don't spend enough time with him or it's because of my old habit of being very clingy to those familiar around me, or if my feelings towards him are true or not.
But, will wait another year and see where it takes us, despite our religious background differences between our families. He is a Buddhist and I am Muslim.
********** ************ ********
We first met during my foundation year at MMU in the Game Developers club (GDC) in 2004/2005. We weren't close at the time, just acquaintances and he had just graduated in August that year.
In my 2nd year, during the 1st Sem of the Trimester, I met him again after being introduced to the pen & paper RPG replica game of Dungeons and Dragons (D&D) by 2 of my friends whom were in the GDC club and Emina Japanese Animation club.
From there, the crush began as next to my other senior of same faculty, I was the only girl in the game and the group. It was there I started having crushes on my bf and 2 other guys, one within the D&D group (chinese) and the other a temporary wushu member studying at CUCMS in Street Mall, a malay boy.
Long story short, for the year I started playing with them, I somehow got attracted to them more and more. Though most of the time I was either too clingy or just plain blur.
Eventually, after my 21st Birthday party, I confessed my feelings. Shocked I was when he revealed that he was waiting for me to confess after the 2nd year playing D&D with the group.
It became official on the 1st of January after some 'discussion'.
The end. Really long winded and sappy or then again maybe not.
******** ******* ****** ******* ********* ********* **********
OKay alot has been revealed in this post.
Please forgive me if it is very long and alot of things being repeated.
Well,
I guess that's all I have to say for today.
Thank you for all those who have dropped by :) and willing to read my posts
Arigato Gozaimas, Terima Kasih,
Ja ne , See ya
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